Is that body art?

When someone refers a tattoo by a body art, I know that they somewhat either have some themselves or love them! When you mention body art to someone they look at you like you are an alien or they just ignore the fact of your mentioning tattoos. These situations are rather common from what I can see. 
Two men were talking behind where I was sitting, taking notes, minding my own business. I happen to have ears that love to be curious so I didn't control what I heard and what I didn't. The conversation was around two adults about one of their teenagers, don't ask me if it was a teenage boy or girl, I have no clue! One the man was very frustrated almost looked worried while the other was confident, seemed more relaxed than the other! The calm guy mentioned "body arts" while the other was staring at him in an odd way. I looked at them both wondering who had tattoos and who didn't... Surprise, surprise, the one that said "body arts" had two sleeves while the other didn't have any visible ones. 

Before I had tattoos myself, I didn't pay attention to people that had them or didn't even bothered listening to how people view them. I always liked tattoos, always thought it was some type of art, but it wasn't such a big deal at the time. Now, I have three, planning more and I cannot stop looking at everyone's tattoos! It's becoming an addiction that grows stronger each time. I've gotten ADDICTED! When people say the pain that tattoos cause is addicting, you better believe them! You will never see a person with just one tattoo, it's either two or more!

My first one is on my wrist, two zodiac signs, love them to bits, have to get them touch up, eventually, but.... Not right now! I was a real disaster when I got it, the pain wasn't as bad as everyone would say, but the noise made me jumpy, almost screamed "bloody murder", poor tattoo artist!
The second one is a bit more special... It's a quote, one I wrote myself, translated by my really amazing Italian friend in Italian (so if there is a mistake it's his fault ha-ha), with a feather pen at the end! I'm a writer, I love Italian, so I just had to, it's me. Want to know the quote on the back of my right shoulder... Ask me.
My third one isn't entirely a mistake, at the time it meant a lot! Still, means a lot , it proved me how much and how far I can go with someone I love. It's a name, and I am indeed thinking of covering it up because it is painful to live with it especially if you want to move on. Lucky me, I love the name, I can deal with the fact that is it on my chest. 

So to get this chest tattoo covered up I was thinking about symbols from where I'm from! Yes, I'm Celtic meaning I've got Irish blood in me for sure! Brittany is a region in France, but it is the little Ireland of France, more Celtic than anything else. I highly prefer saying I'm Bretonne (people from Brittany) than French. A shamrock (the Irish symbol) and have another symbol to represent Brittany a little more to end with an Irish Gaelic word. I'm still looking for the right word to put on my chest as it is indeed a part of my body that gets to be seen more as I do wear tank tops. It's difficult to find the correct tattoo as it is permanent. One mistake is enough! 
I thought about removing it, but it will cost a lot, it will hurt more, and I want that name to be a reminder of certain things like don't make the same "mistake". Once is enough! Next time I put names on my body, it will be my kids' names as a bracelet.

Tattoos are a way to express our feelings, where we are from, what we did. It tells a story, at least my tattoos do. Many of us decide to get them as a reminder of a special event or a family culture... I actually have my friend's roommate who have his country tattooed on his back shoulder, Hawaii. An Island yes, but it is a country and he has it on him. I personally love it! People who have meaningful tattoos have amazing stories behind them as short as the story may be, they are still amazing to me! 

Obviously, they are people that have tattoos just for the fun of it. I was talking to someone over the phone last time and the guy told me he saw two girls have Pokemon on their body. Now, PokemonGo has been the addiction that everyone gets addicted to, but to tattoo your body with that... What are you going to tell your future kids? The funny thing was that apparently, they didn't even know how the Pokemon evolved or anything about it for that matter. You could at least know the name of your Pokemon tattoo. Idiotic, but can't judge, I've got an idiot side as well. I just wouldn't want to have a Charmander on my ankle!
Be careful on what you choose, don't regret anything, if you make a "mistake" just learn from it, tell it to people from experience and be sure you get what you think will last forever or else you are stuck with it, have to cover it up or erase them with the laser. 

For my part, I want that cover up tattoo, then an anchor with the letter "S" and "E" incorporated inside for my mum, Sonia and both of my brothers, Emilian and Enzo! The anchor is from Brittany as it is close to the sea, so it will remind me of how scared I am of water and how much I get seasick in boats. I actually just realize that when I'm typing this post. Smart me... 
Then I'm thinking about getting a simple plane on my left forearm as I do love to travel to places I love, and because planes have been impacting my life in many different ways. I want a souvenir of how much the experiences affected my personality, made me stronger as a person even if it's just a plane to people to me it has meanings. Finally, I would love to get a yin yang on my ankle. I've always been fascinated by it, the good and the evil, the light and the dark, the feminine and the masculine... It's also a reminder of how life and people are. My father isn't a good person whatsoever, but when I look at a yin yang, the dark side also has a bit of light, so if my father is awfully terrible, I know he has some good in him, hiding away, hopefully. Never give up on hope!

If you have ideas on what that Irish word should be, please tell me, I'm interested! I may have really amazing ideas, but we can't have enough of them!

"Tattoos have meanings even the ones you just find pretty! They are on your body for a reason. Art has stories so does tattoos!" 

~Bella

That many friends? Are you sure?

Do you believe you need a thousand friends?

 We as human, need friends, people to converse with because we are social creatures! Can't change that, sorry! We need others to survive, without anyone around, we may lose our mind, and that my friend isn't good news!
Studies have shown that we are at our best when we have friends. True friends!

There is a dark side of having these so-called friends, though it's typically the opposite! As you know, we don't exactly really know someone by heart, we would like to think so, but let's be real, we don't! Humans are capable of a lot of different things, murdering someone, rape, stabbing someone close in the back with words, rat you out to a teacher because you cheated on a test... We don't know people! Anything can happen, our brain is a powerful tool, it controls your moves, it will go from happy you, to jealous and destructive you in a matter of seconds. A situation can change someone's perspective on an issue or life decisions. One day, you'll be the happiest person alive with amazing friends who got your back and the next day nobody is behind you because of something you said or did. Life has obstacles, life is difficult, life is challenging! We, humans, don't fully understand how we work, but I can say that no matter what having friends has its advantages if we are careful enough about the people we let in our lives. 

Real friends will try their best to make you smile over the phone, will try to ease your hard day with a good movie and pizza, they will spend five minutes to take their phones and text you just to see if you are doing okay! Real friends are the ones that will be honest, won't be scared to tell you the horrible truth about you to your face. They won't care if you are sick at home, they will call you or come to you directly. Real friends don't forget you, no matter what, they will always have your back! 

A friend of mine went through a rough path, I couldn't get a hold of him for about a month, I texted him, called him, left voicemails... I went crazy on him! Told him that I was worried, no news means bad news, so I thought he only disappeared on me as what guys tend to do (at least in my case). My experience with guys disappearing on me is getting old, and to be fair, I'm sure not every guy is like that, but somehow I attract these guys! Why would it have been different for my friend? To be exact, he didn't disappear, he was at the hospital with no access to his cell phone. The anger was enormous, I couldn't believe it! He texted a few weeks ago, telling me what was going on, and I felt terrible for being so mad at him. The first thing he said was that he was happy to know that I was still caring even without receiving any messages back. I was still trying to get a hold of him, and it did kind of make him cry. 
It's called friendship even from far, you can always show your support and how much you care about them! My friend was at the hospital, I didn't know anything about it, I was angry at him for not replying, I told him, felt bad afterwards, but I continued to show that I was still there on the phone trying to care and support him. If I can do that, so can you! 
This works for relationships as well... Two people in love with one another, they will do anything for the person, wait patiently, start over to redo something wrong, they will listen to each other's issues, they will be there to support! That again if you are careful enough to know who to trust and not to trust! Some people show a mask, a double personality to hide who they truly are for different reasons like they are afraid the other won't like them for who they are so they pretend to like the same thing, play the same sport, go to the same library... 

Being real in this time period is quite difficult, challenging if I may say! We believe what we see on social media, rumors, what the press say about the pop star who had a diet so you do the same... Society, today, is becoming a complete nightmare! We see all these beautiful people on magazines and try to be like them, to act like them for what exactly? So we can be liked by other people? 
Friends don't care how you dress, how you comb your hair, what type of perfume or makeup you wear. They are your friends because of what you do, say, give, and project. It's about what's in your brain and heart, not what you pretend to be. 

Do we need that many friends to survive? 
In my opinion, I don't think so! Real friends aren't discovered in every household! You can have friends that are more acquaintance than your best friend. You can have hundreds of friends, sure, but how many of them can you count on if you are in big trouble? Who will come to rescue you from danger, who would take a bullet for you?  I always believed that your boyfriend or girlfriend should be a best friend as well... Don't ask me why I'm sure you get the point! 

Choose your friend carefully, your partner carefully! If you find and believe in one person even if it's the wrong time to become friends or lovers, don't give up on them, no matter what happens! These people deserve you, deserve your care and support as well as your love! Don't let the people that check up on you to see if you are holding up slip away from you! Start becoming determined, real friends, real partners are rare nowadays! Don't miss out on anything, we don't know what may happen tomorrow!

"My life is good because I am not passive about it. I invest in what is real. Like real people, to do real things, for the real me." - Gwyneth Paltrow.

~Bella

Settled in...

Alright...

Finally moved out and settled in the new place. Smaller but can't complain!

It's been a big change, odd feelings, and the most annoying couple days you could imagine! 

I got my own room (again), and I'm starting to let go of certain feelings that were existing. 

The good news is, my job is going amazingly well, can't complain about the hours, can't complain about my bosses because honestly, I love it! I'm sure I will be talking about my experiences soon enough! Be prepared for little stories...

This past week was rather tough, the whole month was, but this week was beyond explanation. I learned so much in so little time! For one, don't expect a "Thank you" from anyone especially the ones you trusted. It is a waste of your time and feelings. You will get disappointed by many people in your life. I just started mine, I'm already done with trusting people, giving out everything I have. One more person blew it up for others. 
I don't want to go ahead and complain so I'm going to make it short... Don't give up on people, they are some great ones out there but do NOT trust too easily, don't give in when it comes to temptations, and importantly do NOT give yourself completely (keep having walls, bubble, boundaries) so you don't get too hurt! 

Like I've said in a recent post, autumn means a new start, new love, new everything. You can say goodbye to the past, to the old you and you become a better person for yourself! Strange way to look at a season if you ask me, but this is how I view it. 
I started a new job, thinking of writing more, stop trusting people, not fall in love quickly, and most importantly try to actually spend time for myself even if that means saying "No" to people when they need me. Everyone will survive even if I'm not here for all of them! 

The sun seems perfect, the temperature seems to finally get lower, the wind blows, and the trees become golden. The first day you realize that you need to wear that scarf, sweater maybe a beanie in the morning... It is the season where everyone seems to be happy, to fall in love. Everything becomes a painting, a photo, a new adventure. You fall in love with one another, with the idea of soft scarfs covering your cold neck, protecting you from the little breeze. You fall in love with these amazingly warm blankets, the hot chocolate filled with whipped cream. 

Each year I feel new, I feel in love with myself, I feel like everything is starting to be alright... 
Each year something emotional has to happen, making me stronger...
Each year autumn makes me see who I can have in my life and who should leave...
Each year it becomes better and better...

I learn many different things, but they always make me feel at my best! 

What does autumn teach you? 

"Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile." - William Cullen Bryant

~Bella

What Would Jane Do? (4)

Did you look yourself in the mirror this morning? Did you take a good look? This coming chapter is for everyone! Don't always look at the word "women", if you are a guy and reading this, please take it for yourself as well!

Chapter IV. Check Yourself, Dear

It is very often nothing but our own vanity that deceives us. Women fancy admiration means more than it does. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
A person may be proud without being vain. Pride relates more to our opinion of ourselves; vanity, to what we would have others think of us. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
I make no apologies for my heroine's vanity. If there are young ladies in the world at her time of life more dull of fancy and more careless of pleasing, I know them not. - Sanditon (1817)
Such squeamish youths as cannot bear to be connected with a little absurdity are not worth a regret. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
Where youth and diffidence are united, it requires uncommon steadiness of reason to resist the attraction of being called the most charming girl in the world. - Northanger Abbey (1817)
But that is one great difference between us. Compliments always take you by surprise, and me never. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
One is apt, I believe, to connect assurance of manner with coquetry, and to expect that an impudent address will naturally attend an impudent mind.- Lady Susan (1794)
Vanity working on a weak head produces every sort of mischief. - Emma (1815)
Pictures of perfection as you know, make me sick and wicked. - Letters
Seldom, very seldom, does complete truth belong to any human disclosure; seldom can it happen that something is not a little disguised or a little mistaken. - Emma (1815)
Sense will always have attractions for me. - Sense and Sensibility (1811)
I cannot speak well enough to be unintelligible.- Northanger Abbey (1817)
Better be without sense than misapply it as you do. - Emma (1815)
Wisdom is better than wit, and in the long run, will certainly have the laugh on her side.- Letters
[She] is one of those young ladies who seek to recommend themselves to the other sex by undervaluing their own... But, in my opinion, it is a paltry device, a very mean art. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
Next to being married, a girl likes to be crossed in love a little now and then. It is something to think of, and give her a sort of distinction among her companions. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
All the privilege I claim for my own sex... Is that of loving longest, when existence or when hope is gone. - Persuasion (1817)
Her character depends on upon those she is with, but in good hands, she will turn out a valuable woman. - Emma (1815)
In nine cases out of ten, a woman had better show more affection than she feels. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
She denied none of it aloud and agreed to none of it in private. - Emma (1815)

I hate to hear you talking... As if women were all fine ladies instead of rational creatures. We none of us expect to be in smooth water all our days. - Persuasion (1817)
A lady's imagination is very rapid; it jumps from admiration to love, from love to matrimony in a moment. - Pride and Prejudice (1813)
A lady, without a family, was the very best preserver of furniture in the world.- Persuasion (1817)
It sometimes happens that a woman is more handsome at twenty-nine than she was ten years before. - Persuasion (1817)
The woman is fine for her own satisfaction alone. No man will admire her the more, no woman will like her the better for it. - Northanger Abbey (1817)
Give a girl an education and introduction her properly into the world, and ten to one but she has the means of settling well, without further expense to anybody. - Mansfield Park (1814)
She was sensible and clever but eager in everything; her sorrow, her joys, could have no moderation. - Sense and Sensibility (1811)
She was determined, as she felt it be her duty, to try to overcome all that was excessive. -Mansfield Park (1814)
She felt that she could so much more depend on upon the sincerity of those who sometimes looked or said a careless or a hasty thing, than of those whose presence of mind never varied, whose tongue never slipped. - Persuasion (1817)
Do not consider me now as an elegant female intending to plague you but as a rational creature speaking the truth from her heart. -Pride and Prejudice (1813)
The enthusiasm of a woman's love is even beyond the biographer's. - Mansfield Park (1814)

See you next chapter... Which seems to be more for women, sorry, but please come and read! 


"Life seems but a quick succession of busy nothings." - 

~Bella

Why are you always hungry?

Curious little me, I looked around in magazines, websites, my mum's healthy food books and here is what I could come up with for... WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS HUNGRY?


You are eating too fast! Why rushing and not let your body process and release the hormones that signals feeling full. You may end up being in a rush, I understand, but your body doesn't let it run its normal course instead of trying to rush things. 

You might just be thirsty! Thirst is easily mistaken for hunger, but don't let it fool you. Do drink before grabbing the next snack! Not drinking enough water may result in wanting to eat anything that is in front of you! And no, I'm not really talking about fruits, I'm talking about sweets! 

Welcome in, cravings! Our brain is powerful enough to make us want a specific taste as in white chocolate ice cream. It's not about needing, but more about wanting! 

Sleep deprivation may have a role in this situation. Believe it or not, not getting enough sleep will end up in not getting the hormone that it needs! Leptin isn't producing enough! To keep your energy up, your body ask for food since you aren't giving it enough sleep! 

Watching TV or something on your computer. Don't try and lie to yourself, you will always want some sweets, chips, or even have a whole meal! At the movies, you tend to go buy some candies or popcorn. It's automatic nowadays! 

Addiction doesn't have to be drug addiction... If you eat the same thing often your body will become addicted to the same things. Butter, salt, sugar... Whenever you go in restaurants, watch for how much butter and salt they use, you'll be surprised. They make you want more and more! It becomes an addiction rather quickly!

If you think you are hungry, don't go straight for the fast food, the chips or sweets. Drink water first, then have balanced meals. It's supposed to be three meals a day, breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Don't let your brain fool you in wanting salty food! That sleep... You better get some, it will save you a trip to the fridge!

"I may look like I'm having deep thoughts but 99% of the time I'm thinking about what I'm going to eat later."

~Bella

Well "Hello" there...

DO NOT JUDGE OR INTERPRET ANYTHING! 

This week as been tough!Job training for three days, getting boxes to move out, a complete love disaster, no support, more disasters and finally the political debate that I DO NOT FOLLOW! 
Oh please go ahead and think I'm not patriotic enough, that I'm stupid for not knowing what's really going on politically... I don't mind! 

Funny fact is I DO NOT care one bit about the next president because either way it honestly sucks! Trump is far from the best, just a hint of dictatorship, we all know how it goes, we've seen how dictators are in the past, take Hitler for example! Next thing you'll know is if he gets elected... Welcome WWIII.  I really don't want to see America fall apart because of a rich guy who only wants fame! Then there is Hilary, a woman in power... Seem like she would be great, but no! Liar just like every political person! She won't a war, but she won't stop anything either, she will do as the French president does... "Welcome to our country where you can bomb our cities and destroy everything in the process!" ... It's how I view France at the moment, sadly, even if it's my birth country, I'm hating on the government for letting EVERYONE pass and let bad people destroy countries, cities, villages, families! 

I hate politics, I don't talk about and ignore the fact that every political person is the next liar on the stand! I don't care if it's a woman, a jew, a rich or poor person, a colored man or woman... To me, if you are a political figure, you are considered a liar who doesn't keep any promises, who keeps messing up the government. There are some great political people, great influence, but it's easy to name them since there are rare. No, I won't name any names, I don't want to fight or start an argument about my views! I don't even want to actually have any presidents because all it does it either make someone happy or sad. It makes mistakes after mistakes. It doesn't even hear anyone or anything. 
Each country has a fair of bad government, I only know the American, the French, the Italian, the Russian, the British one, and the German one to base my judgment on the subject, and it's enough for me because I dislike politics in general, if I can ignore or just move on from it,  I will without hesitation! Throughout stories, I hear from friends, family members or just strangers and with my own experiences, I can say for a fact that political conversations are a great way to start a fight with another person or two. You want to get into a heated argument, you want to challenge someone, please go ahead and talk about who you will vote for the next president or want to see in the white house (any places). 

Instead of watching liars competing against one another, I've been into the awful bombardments that have been happening in the world. Crying have been around for personal issues, but mostly because of videos I've watched, the research I have done for myself on what's going on with Syria and Russia. Crying over the parents who are losing children because bombs are hitting their villages, homes, schools, hospitals... Wars aren't the answer! Why fight? Talking isn't enough? Just because someone has a different color skin, a different religion or even a difficult culture doesn't mean they aren't a bit similar to you! 

I'm European and I live in California! No, I do not have my American citizenship yet, I will get it just not yet, but I'm a bit like everyone. I have two eyes to see what's going on right under my nose, I have two ears to hear the sad news on TV, I'm a woman just like half of the population, I went to school like most people, I'm a living creature, a human being just like you! I don't have the same nationality, I don't have the same values, the same opinion or same culture, but I have a similar thing to you! Indeed, this gets me angry, frustrated, furious because our world is destroying itself because we are unhappy people who never have enough, always want more money, more fame, more of everything. When was the last time you actually saw a really happy rich person? Do you think they have everything? Yes, they have big houses, an amazing looking car that cost much more than what most of us have in our pockets, yes, they have pools, parties, animals, nannies, cleaning ladies, more money, but do they have someone who loves them for who they are instead of what they have in their bank account?? I don't think so! Put a poor person and a rich person next to each other... You'll see the poor smile big while the rich one will have a blank stare. 

Our society is building a generation of sheep, a generation who are immature enough to go to wars because the president said so, cowards. What are we giving to our next generation, honestly? What are we leaving them with? NOTHING GOOD! Wars, money, destructive people, killers, liars, no good will come out of what we are becoming and what we are leaving behind. Each war has an impact, look at WWI and WWII, Europe was a mess, these wars left many scars behind, a lot of history, much more pain and suffering. We still hear new stories, new lies, new truths every day.

Sorry but I won't watch any debates, no politics, I won't bow down to a government that leaves our country, our world into a fighting site. I'm more the revolutionary type of person, sadly, I can't do much by myself. When I said we work best together, I wasn't just referring to sports or in a relationship, I was talking about an every fight to keep our world alive. Maybe Martin Luther King should be more remembered, Kennedy... These admired people should be remembered more often because without them half of what we are, what we did, what we believe wouldn't be there. Fights for good aren't done alone but with many people, revolutions like the French revolution wasn't fought by one single human being, but many. 
I want to help my future, our future, but I can't do it alone... And seeing, hearing things, having a government that doesn't help people in actual need makes me sick in my stomach! WE aren't standing up for ourselves, for our country, for our world, we are following the society because it's what we know, what we are comfortable enough to see! 

"Sometimes, it falls upon a generation to be great. You can be that great generation. Let your greatness blossom." - Nelson Mandela.

~Bella

Psych 101... Love, Listening to your heart, continue...

JOHN LEE'S SIX STYLES OF LOVE

John Lee believed the different styles of love were similar to the rules of a color wheel. Much like the way a color wheel features three primary colors, Lee believed that love could be broken down into three basic primary styles. These are:

• Eros: Loving the ideal of a person both physically and emotionally.
• Ludos: A type of love that is played like a game or conquest (and might result in many partners at one time). 
• Storge: Love that stems from a friendship over time.

Just like the primary colors of a color wheel can be combined and create complimentary colors, so too can the primary love styles. The result is three secondary styles of love:

• Mania: A combination of Eros and Ludos, Mania is a style of love that is obsessive. This includes emotional highs and lows, jealousy, and very possessive feelings. 
• Pragma: A combination of Ludos and Storge, Pragma is a love that is practical. Lovers go into the situation with the hopes of reaching their final goal. Expectations of the relationship are thought about practically and realistically. 
• Agape: A combination of Eros and Storge, Agape is a love that is all-encompassing and selfless 

ROBERT STERNBERG'S TRIANGULAR THEORY OF LOVE

In this 2004 theory, Robert Sternberg proposed that love could be broken down into three parts: intimacy, passion, and commitment.

• Intimacy: Closeness, supporting one another, sharing with one another, and feeling loved.
• Passion: Feelings of sexual arousal and attraction, and euphoria. This is what drives two individuals together.
• Commitment: The desire to remain loyal to another person and stay in a long-term relationship.

From these three components, seven different combinations can be created. The easiest way to understand this is by looking at it as a triangle. In the triangle, intimacy, passion, and commitment are the vertices, and the seven combinations are the connections between these vertices. 

Alternatively, here is another way to look at it: 

• Liking or Friendship: This represents a friendship where there are closeness and a strong bond, but there is not any passion or commitment present. 
• Infatuation or Limerance: This is what a person feels when he or she experiences "love at first sight." Because there is no commitment or intimacy, infatuation can be fleeting. 
• Empty Love: This is when a love has lost intimacy and passion, but there is still a strong commitment between the two people. 
• Romantic Love: Romantic love features intimacy and passion, meaning there are sexual arousal and an emotional bond, but there is a lack of commitment.
• Companionate Love: This is a type of love where passion does not exist or no longer exists, but there is still a great commitment and deep affection for one another. This type of love is found among family members, close friends, and can even be found in marriages.
• Fatuous Love: This is a type of love that only features passion and commitment, but lacks intimacy. An example of fatuous love is a brief or impulsive marriage. 
• Consummate Love: This is the ideal form of love, and it features intimacy, passion, and commitment. Sternberg claimed that once consummate love was achieved, it would be even harder to maintain and that it may not be permanent. If for example, passion becomes lost with the passage of time, then the consummate love would turn into companionate love. 

During the lifespan of a relationship, Sternberg believed that the balance between intimacy, passion, and commitment would shift. Understanding the three components of love and the seven types can help couples recognize what they need to improve upon, what they should avoid, and even when it might be time to end the relationship. 

" The purpose of psychology is to give us a completely different idea of the things we know best." - Paul Valery

~Bella