Little story...

A few days ago, as I was walking home from downtown, I was stopped by two young men who ended up being interesting, funny, sweet and quite charming to say the least.

Before I go into the story let me remind you that no matter what, I have a hard time trusting people, and I wouldn't throw myself in a dangerous situation! It's not my style to hang out with strangers, but I know the street of the city, the people and if something has to happen, I'm sure I would know what to do.
So that said let's begin....

But first let's call the first guy, the guy who complimented me, Matteo( Cause it's my favourite name), and the second guy, the friend, Stephano (cause that's the only name I could come up with)! I don't want to put their names down, that's just disrespectful and I didn't ask their permission to put them either way... 

I was walking home, earphones in, music loud enough to stay in my little world, keeping the outside world away from me and my thoughts. A red light hit, making me stay on the side of the road, waiting patiently for the green light to turn on. Two guys were on my left, talking to each other and others on my other side, behind. I crossed the street, seeing the two guys in the corner of my eyes stay put. I didn't think of much at the time, and then next thing I know, I see Matteo trying to talk to me from the side, " I like your shirt."
What a starter.
I thanked him and we started talking to the point where his friend, Stephano, came along, saying that Matteo, who to be honest was brave enough to talk to a random girl on the street, had found me cute. I blushed inside, I didn't know if this was real or just a prank. My imagination can make up scenarios, good enough to make me be skeptical about everything.
After a good five minutes of chitchat, I left to go back home, but something inside stopped me from doing so. I turned around, looked if they were still at the spot, and walked back, determined to know what they wanted, what made them want to chat with me. Surprise on their faces made me believe it wasn't a prank, it was just something I cannot describe!
We ended up talking for hours, grab dinner well only Stephano had dinner, and I got to be brought home, safe and sound.

It might sound odd, hanging out with two random guys, one that came up and complimented my shirt, tattoo. It's odd, I ain't disagreeing with it. I don't exactly know what came up to me to go back and give my number to the guy, hang out with them, trust them in a car, trust them at all. The feeling I had with them was nothing negative, I was myself, no makeup on (not that I actually wear makeup anyways), messy hair (like usual), and I was trying to hide my accent which I believe I was failing badly at. I don't know what overcame me to give my phone number, give them my time (I had nothing planned for the night but still...)
Which I don't fully understand is the fact that I did felt incredibly good in Matteo's arms. It's that weird feeling which cannot be explained, that feeling of security. It's rare for me to feel secure and yet... I still felt it when I was trying to get him warm. 

To be honest, now, it's about the thoughts that keep popping up, the ones which don't leave me alone. The ones that are stubborn enough to make me make scenarios in my head. The funny thing is I know I should not be thinking about the night, thinking about the guy which made me feel good, which brought a smile on my face when I was too preoccupied understanding why I had walked back up to them, added my phone number to one's phone. I shouldn't because it was only a night, and if I do have news from them again, that will be a miracle, something I'm far from believing. 

Now, all I can do is wait, patiently. 

"Smile at strangers and you just might change a life." - Steve Maraboli

~Bella

Dreams... Psych 101

DREAMS

What goes on when the lights are off

In psychology, dreams are defined as any thoughts, images, or emotions that person experiences while asleep. Psychologists have yet to agree on why we dream and what these dreams mean, but there are several significant theories. 

The "Science" of Sleep
Believe it or not, scientists still don't know the reason or purpose for sleeping in the first case!

FRAUD'S PSYCHOANALYTIC THEORY OF DREAMS

Sigmund Freud believed that the contents of our dreams were associated with wish fulfillment and that our dreams represented the thoughts, motivations, and desires of our unconscious. Furthermore, Freud believed that the sexual instincts that the conscious represses appear in our dreams. In Freud's book, The Interpretation of Dreams, Freud broke dreams down into two components: 

• Manifest content - The actual thoughts, content, and images in the dream.
• Latent content - The psychological meaning in the dreams that is hidden. 

To understand the meaning being dreams, Freud broke dreams down into five distinct parts:

• Displacement: When a desire for something is represented by something or someone else. 
• Projection: When the wants and desires of the dreamer are pushed onto another person in the dream. 
• Symbolization: When the urges and desire that are suppressed are metaphorically acted out in the dream.
• Condensation: When a lot of information is compressed into one image or thought, making difficult to decipher. 
• Secondary Revision: The final stage of dreaming, where the incoherent elements become reorganized into a comprehensible dream.

While research has refuted Freud's theory of the latent content being disguised by the manifest content, the work of Sigmund Freud contributed greatly to interest in the field of dream interpretation.

CARL JUNG'S THEORY ON DREAMS

While Jung believed in much of what Freud did when it came to dreams, Jung thought dreams were not just an expression of repressed desires, but that they also compensated for those parts of the psyche that were undeveloped during waking life. Jung also believed dreams revealed the collective unconscious and personal unconscious and featured archetypes that were representative of unconscious thoughts. 

COMMON THEMES FOUND IN DREAMS

The following are ten of the most common themes people experience while dreaming, as well as the possible meanings of these themes according to Freudian theory.

1. Taking a test that you are not prepared for: This type of dream does not only pertain to an academic test, and will usually be specific to the dreamer. For example, an actor might dream about not remembering their audition or not being able to recognize the words on a script. This type of dream deals with the feeling of being exposed, and the test might symbolize being judged or evaluated by someone else. 
2. Being naked or inappropriately dressed in public: This type of dream relates to feelings of shame or vulnerability.
3. Being chased or attacked: This type of dream is much more common in children, whose dreams tend to focus on more physical rather than social fear. Additionally, their size can often make them feel as though they are more physically vulnerable. In adults, this type of dream can be a sign of being under stress.
4. Falling: Falling can represent feelings of being extremely overwhelmed with your current situation and having a loss of control. 
5. Being lost in transit: This often represents feeling lost or trying to get something or find your path and being unsure of how to do it. 
6. Losing a tooth: This can represent feeling unheard or unseen in a personal relationship, or feelings of aggression. 
7. Natural disasters: This can signify feeling so overwhelmed by personal problems that it seems they are raging out of control. 
8. Flying:  This can represent a desire to escape or be free from a situation.
9. Dying or being injured: This can represent something in the dreamer's everyday life that no longer thrives or is wilting away, like a personal relationship or personal attribute, and does not necessarily mean or imply true thoughts of death. 
10. Losing control of a car: This type of dream can result from feelings of stress and fear, and of not feeling in control of everyday life. 

While Psychologists still do not fully understand dreams, their interpretation plays a key role in modern psychology. From Freud's prominently used interpretation of dream analysis, which suggests dreams are connected to our unconscious and represent repressed desires, to the work of G. William Domhoff, who believed dreams were merely a result of neurological processes, understanding why dreams occurs and the various details and possible meanings behind them remains a very important part of psychology. 

"I am a daydreamer and night thinker." 

~Bella

Want to go at the party?

If you don't know me or want to learn a little about me this might just do the trick!

You know what an introvert is? Right? Well if you aren't sure here is the definition (in my own words and what I think it is, based on myself)...
A shy person who prefers to spend time alone away from the crowd doing their own thing.

The online definition, in my opinion, wasn't right! My only concern isn't my own thoughts or feelings, it's actually the opposite! I don't care much about myself, I'm more the over caring about others type of person! So the definition is wrong for my part! It will teach me to always look up definitions online...


I'm an introvert! Alright, to be more precise I'm in between the introvert and extrovert... I'm mostly made up of introvert "genes".

Let's say that instead of going to parties or go drink at a local bar (I ain't 21 yet so I can't do that in the US), I will just stay cozy at home or with a person or two having fun outside or something. The idea of being around more than five people is considered a crowd to me and anxiety builds up quickly, I feel uncomfortable... But then again, I can totally make it work. I went to Las Vegas last summer for a convention with my "big sister" and I was alone with a bunch of strangers for the most part of the day and I felt completely fine! So I guess it depends on my mood as well... If I wake up on the wrong side of the bed, don't blame me just blame the bed...

Being an introvert has its perks, though, we will make fewer insults, make less social gaffes... Obviously, if you are with someone that doesn't know you, you will be judged and they won't try to understand you. That's far from being a perk, but they can't read your mind so just tell them that you don't feel comfortable around too many people. 

The first time I realized that I was more the introvert type of girl is when back in high school I decided to leave and do homeschooling. I would do better by myself than listening to people teach me and work with others. It was an eye-opening, and then I saw that there was plenty more situation that could have led me to realize it sooner. I would always or most the time, decline a party invite when I knew there was going to be lots of people. Or when I would lock myself in my room without the outside world, I was more on my computer (I still kind of do that at times, I miss being by myself and prefer to lock myself in). My experience of growing up wasn't at all like most kids, I had to grow up faster, mature quicker than most people my age. I didn't do crazy things, rebel on my parents, or anything a young teenager would do. In my opinion, I became introvert when I came in California, not speaking the language, feeling alone not understood by anyone. It made my teenage years quite different... I had family issues to deal with and I couldn't concentrate on friends. It's not like I was a loner, far from it, but I wasn't spending as much time as I should have. Now I regret it a little. Sometimes,  I want to do it all over again and mature up just like the others... But time traveling hasn't been a success to anyone yet, so I'm quite glad I mature up it makes me talk to older people more. That's pretty nice :)
The funny thing is I still have my extrovert side that shows up once in a while. I talk to people more, and I can meet new acquaintance easily. That side isn't really put in front, though, you may get lucky if I choose to talk to you. I tend to be careful on who I talk to in general.

Just because I can be unsocial doesn't mean I can't party and talk to people normally. It doesn't mean I never go outside, I actually try my best to get out (even though right now it's more the hiding from the sun part that keeps me inside, ha-ha), and it certainly not mean I can't live a normal life. It's not a disease or disorder! So stop judging! There's plenty of us on this planet, and even though not everyone understands us, we make the best out of it.

"Solitude matters, and for some people, it's the air they breathe." -Susan Cain

~Bella