February...
Short month but full of excitement!
One, my brother's birthday, 19th birthday, still cannot believe it!
Second, Valentine's Day which will be not sure how... Single squad!
Third, still, apartment hunting, send help!
Despite all the good energy that I've been trying to send my ways, it's hard to keep a clear mind, a positive attitude when you miss home (Ireland), when you miss friends ( I won't say names but I do miss the "Peanut" calling), when there are family issues, and when no one is helpful in the apartment hunting.
The one thing that has been bothering me is how one of my friends left home for the air force. That one piece of news hit hard. Not sure how to view such an action especially coming from such a brilliant person. I ain't against military actions and such but when it comes to having a good friend leave... There's something that triggers a part of you to hate the military.
How many families have been broken by their loved ones going?
How many of them didn't return?
How many of them did return but still struggle with PTSD?
How many families are waiting for news?
So many questions and the only person that has left for the military is a friend, I don't know how the family can cope because I miss having my friend around.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all the way in Europe, it was already difficult to keep in touch every day, but we tried to keep in touch whenever between text messages, emails, phone calls... I could go on...
I'm sure he is proud to serve the country any possible way, but I'm not entirely sure how to take that news myself. How to take the fact that he is gone...
When he broke the news to me, I cried myself that night, not thinking positively at all. All I could do is just watch "Dear John". Talk about romance and broken heart and military life... Go figure, when you are sad, you watch more sad films...
Serving your country is amazing, you should be proud if you have served or if you know someone who does. What I don't like is you see your loved ones leave... The long waiting periods for them to call, message, or come home to you. I know I would be able to endure it for love, but I hate not knowing if they are coming back or not.
Love/ Hate relationship if you say the least.
I guess you could say I'm starting to worry despite my own self being in a different country than him.
People who are dealing with this type of situation should be proud of themselves and the ones who have left...
~Bella
Showing posts with label broken. Show all posts
Showing posts with label broken. Show all posts
Wednesday, 6 February 2019
Wednesday, 2 November 2016
He Broke you...
" I'm sorry he broke your heart. I'm sorry you didn't see the jerk in him. I'm sorry you made him seem better than he really was. I'm sorry he moved on so quickly. I'm sorry he's flirting with your friends. I'm sorry he avoids you. I'm sorry you cry most nights. I'm sorry you feel worthless and used and sad. I'm sorry that you feel in love with someone not worth this pain. I'm sorry he left. I'm sorry you can't help but wake up in the middle of the night and think of all the memories. Believe me, I'm sorry you have to go through this. But don't turn bitter from it, or you'll start pushing away the one boy that'll come and try and save you."
~Bella
Monday, 23 May 2016
Even from far there's always an European by my side...
As I mentioned in a previous post, I have a friend/twin back in Italy who is like two years older than me, but that doesn't stop us from being amazing... I know it is far, an entire ocean separating us, and yet we find a way to stay close to each other, kind of, in our own ways. Thank you mostly for Whatsapp and Skype!
Being two hopeless romantics, who happens to help one another, smile even when mad at each other is what one may call a strong bond.
Let me tell you all about our friendship because how far as being funny, it's also sweet!
We've known each other for quite some time now, more than a year for sure, and still laugh at our stupidity. We both love soccer and yet we managed to hate each other on the fact that we love two different teams, I'm a Juventus fan and he's more a Torino fan... We ALL know that Juventus is way better than Torino, I mean they are both from Torino (Turin), but my team is better! And I don't miss an opportunity to tease him about it, deep down he loves it ;). I must say I really enjoy showing him my Juventus scarf, it's amazing and warm... And hurtful to his eyes. Ha-ha
Our bond is usually really strong when it comes to EVERYTHING! The sweet messages, and the truth being said, I don't think you can ask anything else. I mean, who wouldn't want to receive a message saying "Sei la cosa più dolce che mi sia mai capitata." Which roughly means, " You are the sweetest thing that ever happened to me." How can you stop talking to someone who is sweet and there for you? It's impossible!
A few weeks ago, I managed to get worried about him, to the point where I got really angry, and still to this day want to slap him for making me worried sick! When two people are far from each other, it's easy to get worried, so if you are reading this, don't be mad... I just care! We even disappointed each other... Hey, we all make mistakes, I'm still an angel with a little devil inside, it won't be coming out soon, no worries.
What's funny about our friendship is that even from a long distance we know exactly how the other person is feeling. I know it's sounds odd, but let me tell you, he knows when something is wrong with me, but he won't push me to tell him what's up. Which somehow makes me smile quite big, I don't need to tell him much, he knows...
Yesterday, Sunday 22nd of May, we skyped for about an hour, laughing and talking about pretty much everything. It was passed two in the morning for him, oh but let me share how energetic he was! After telling me how many coffees he had during the day, I understood why he couldn't stay put. Behind the Italian accent and the way he talks with his hands... I couldn't stop laughing! I'm used to hearing his very cute accent, but I love how he makes tiny mistakes when he speaks English. No matter how hard I try not to laugh, sometimes I can't hold it in, he will look for certain words forever, and if I don't figure it out, he will just drop the subject or just say it in Italian. Lucky him, I'm not too horrible when it comes to understanding it, reading is easier, though!
So, usually I eat something during our video chats, I'm not sure why, but I always have something in my mouth, either candy or just cookies, but yesterday beside my very tired face and my messy hair, nothing much happened. I was not such a great mood, mostly depressed, and didn't really feel like talking about myself, so he ended up making me laugh without doing anything. By the way, have you ever had trouble zipping a jacket? Because he did! Me, being sarcastic, offered a hand, I couldn't stop laughing, he couldn't zip his jacket, and even took two minutes to finally zip it up. What a great look, though! I really liked that jacket!
Friendships are easy, and you know you can count on certain ones to make you smile. Fights end quickly, and you may end up laughing at nothing. Even yesterday, I'm not sure if I was making a face or not, as he often says that I have millions of facial expressions, he was laughing and trying to imitate me. Apparently he has a new favorite face, the one I look mad, but not like crazy mad, just slightly frowning and looking at him like "What is wrong with you"... Santa Cleopatra, it's hard to imitate my facial expressions and I end up laughing at him if he does try. The best part is that no matter how bad you may look, he always says "You're beautiful". Honestly, it's a boost of confidence that rush in, and I cannot complain!
To end this post, I want to thank him for everything that he has been doing for me, from being serious to stupid. Yes, he is blond, dirty blond, but he is far from stupid. I just love to tease him... Just like I love to be myself in front of him. I love how I pick up on his accent and end up saying his sayings like " Don't say baloney". It's part of my daily speech. I have come up with the weirdest expressions ever and if I say it in front of an American, they look at me like I'm an alien. Like the one he said yesterday, it's not the first time I heard it because I know I've used it before but " I have a fresh brain." I'm sure Americans have a similar expression, but this one, come on, it must be Italian expressions. It's funny, but I have to thank him for that! If you are still reading this post, you have all the credits!
Little side note... There's so much to talk about, that I highly think I'm going to have to post quite a lot about our strong bonds, and there'll be other post about my friend and myself. So don't think it's the end because it's not :).
" ... Strong bonds are forged in high emotional temperatures. " -Dervla Murphy
~Bella
Being two hopeless romantics, who happens to help one another, smile even when mad at each other is what one may call a strong bond.
Let me tell you all about our friendship because how far as being funny, it's also sweet!
We've known each other for quite some time now, more than a year for sure, and still laugh at our stupidity. We both love soccer and yet we managed to hate each other on the fact that we love two different teams, I'm a Juventus fan and he's more a Torino fan... We ALL know that Juventus is way better than Torino, I mean they are both from Torino (Turin), but my team is better! And I don't miss an opportunity to tease him about it, deep down he loves it ;). I must say I really enjoy showing him my Juventus scarf, it's amazing and warm... And hurtful to his eyes. Ha-ha
Our bond is usually really strong when it comes to EVERYTHING! The sweet messages, and the truth being said, I don't think you can ask anything else. I mean, who wouldn't want to receive a message saying "Sei la cosa più dolce che mi sia mai capitata." Which roughly means, " You are the sweetest thing that ever happened to me." How can you stop talking to someone who is sweet and there for you? It's impossible! A few weeks ago, I managed to get worried about him, to the point where I got really angry, and still to this day want to slap him for making me worried sick! When two people are far from each other, it's easy to get worried, so if you are reading this, don't be mad... I just care! We even disappointed each other... Hey, we all make mistakes, I'm still an angel with a little devil inside, it won't be coming out soon, no worries.
What's funny about our friendship is that even from a long distance we know exactly how the other person is feeling. I know it's sounds odd, but let me tell you, he knows when something is wrong with me, but he won't push me to tell him what's up. Which somehow makes me smile quite big, I don't need to tell him much, he knows...
Yesterday, Sunday 22nd of May, we skyped for about an hour, laughing and talking about pretty much everything. It was passed two in the morning for him, oh but let me share how energetic he was! After telling me how many coffees he had during the day, I understood why he couldn't stay put. Behind the Italian accent and the way he talks with his hands... I couldn't stop laughing! I'm used to hearing his very cute accent, but I love how he makes tiny mistakes when he speaks English. No matter how hard I try not to laugh, sometimes I can't hold it in, he will look for certain words forever, and if I don't figure it out, he will just drop the subject or just say it in Italian. Lucky him, I'm not too horrible when it comes to understanding it, reading is easier, though!
So, usually I eat something during our video chats, I'm not sure why, but I always have something in my mouth, either candy or just cookies, but yesterday beside my very tired face and my messy hair, nothing much happened. I was not such a great mood, mostly depressed, and didn't really feel like talking about myself, so he ended up making me laugh without doing anything. By the way, have you ever had trouble zipping a jacket? Because he did! Me, being sarcastic, offered a hand, I couldn't stop laughing, he couldn't zip his jacket, and even took two minutes to finally zip it up. What a great look, though! I really liked that jacket!
Friendships are easy, and you know you can count on certain ones to make you smile. Fights end quickly, and you may end up laughing at nothing. Even yesterday, I'm not sure if I was making a face or not, as he often says that I have millions of facial expressions, he was laughing and trying to imitate me. Apparently he has a new favorite face, the one I look mad, but not like crazy mad, just slightly frowning and looking at him like "What is wrong with you"... Santa Cleopatra, it's hard to imitate my facial expressions and I end up laughing at him if he does try. The best part is that no matter how bad you may look, he always says "You're beautiful". Honestly, it's a boost of confidence that rush in, and I cannot complain!
To end this post, I want to thank him for everything that he has been doing for me, from being serious to stupid. Yes, he is blond, dirty blond, but he is far from stupid. I just love to tease him... Just like I love to be myself in front of him. I love how I pick up on his accent and end up saying his sayings like " Don't say baloney". It's part of my daily speech. I have come up with the weirdest expressions ever and if I say it in front of an American, they look at me like I'm an alien. Like the one he said yesterday, it's not the first time I heard it because I know I've used it before but " I have a fresh brain." I'm sure Americans have a similar expression, but this one, come on, it must be Italian expressions. It's funny, but I have to thank him for that! If you are still reading this post, you have all the credits!
Little side note... There's so much to talk about, that I highly think I'm going to have to post quite a lot about our strong bonds, and there'll be other post about my friend and myself. So don't think it's the end because it's not :).
" ... Strong bonds are forged in high emotional temperatures. " -Dervla Murphy
~Bella
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